Thursday, 22 March 2018

Leaving Romania

I was hoping to do a full 365 days here before flying back to the UK. However it was not to be.  My godfather died recently and this week I am returning to the UK for his requiem.  I adored him and I know I was loved very much by him.  I would not miss this for the world.  However, it is with a heavy heart that I leave Romania, though DV it will just be for a few days, also assuming the spring snow doesn't play havoc with the flights.


I still can't quite understand why this country means so much to me, but it does.  I seem to have found my rest and the place where I feel alive.  And this is happening at a very deep level.  I think the bottom line is I want to die out here, and that is why leaving (albeit briefly) feels like such a difficult thing to do.  It feels wrong, like leaving a lover feels wrong....

My godfather was an English gentleman.  They don't make them like that any more.  With him dies any love I had for the quintessentially English.  He was honourable, fair minded, good natured, competitive, enthusiastic about everything and always curious.  He was also quintessentially Anglican and embodied the via media.  He embodied it to the point of being infinitely flexible in his beliefs, but infinitely sure of God's greater flexibility. There was simply nothing to dislike about him despite our somewhat heated theological debates.  I could never stop thinking that God loves His crazy Anglicans.

So the feature of England I was fondest of will be interred on Monday and I wish my heart was not dreading beating on English soil quite so much. She was only ever the place where we lived, she was never home and I no longer understand her or want to understand her. Indeed the political climate in England is such that I'm glad I'm not paying tax in the UK.  I am horrified by the level of stupidity, moral grandstanding, dishonesty, the lact of intellectual integrity and inability to be anything other than emotive and petulant that is currently on display within British politics.  It is disgusting.  We are finished....

....though I will be packing tea bags, decent curry powder and Marmite into my case for my return....

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