Monday, 3 January 2011

If...

If my opinion mattered in the slightest and I if had any influence over anything, these are the things I’d like to see happen in 2011. Selfish things, things that irritate me and I’d like to see changed….

For the Liturgy: I’d ban any sung setting of the Mass that had endlessly repeated Amen, Amen, Amens in it. Eighteenth century composers with big wigs are just as guilty as 1970s composers with tragic knitwear and beige slacks for this. It is wrong, wrong ,wrong. Amen only needs saying once or at most twice in any given context, endless repetition to some dire tune grates on the nerves. Does Jean-Luc Picard need to say “Make it so” more than once? No, he does not. The same logic applies with Amen.

In Education: I’d like to see a “bonfire of the vanities” with the national curriculum. In future all subject curricula will have to fit on a single side of A5. I’d like, once again, to be able to teach Physics, rather than the castrated imposter-subject that is currently part of the National Curriculum (the vital but missing apparatus being mathematics and coherence).

Tax: Get rid of these criminal taxes on things where duty is already paid; inheritance tax and VAT on fuel spring to mind. This could be offset with a shoe tax: higher tax for anyone who annually buys more than 5 pairs of shoes for themselves, an annoyance tax: handed out to those that inflict our children and ourselves with the phrases “you guys”, “OK guys” and “OK kids” and a “Tony Blair tax”: given out to any former public servant who has made millions after mismanaging their office, tax’em till it hurts.

Politics: I’d like to see some small scale feudalism. I’d quite happily tithe myself to a (good Catholic) landowner and promise to do X number of days work for him in return for a roof over my head, a peppercorn rent and the freedom to do what I reasonably wanted for the rest of the time. I think I’d even let him have my vote (did I really say that?!). The NHS can stop providing free contraceptives to those who are currently eligible, this would save millions. And death to the Liverpool Care Plan (state sanctioned Euthanasia; unless you are able to manipulate it).

I can dream…..

3 comments:

Tom in Vegas said...

I trying to think of which piece of music that I've been exposed to contains a perpetual "Amen." Thankfully, I cannot. but I certainly can recall a few pieces that rank "criminal" by any reasonable standard.

A modern day feudal system? I think I'll pass on that one. I'll stay attached to my hopes of winning the lottery and living beach-side with my loved ones for the rest of my life. Who knows? Stranger things have happened.

I can dream, right? :0)

Robert said...

Very funny! I mean, I'm sure you're serious in principle but your presentation is very clever.

You're right about the Amen. We don't need to say/sing it more than twice. In older translations of the Gospels, Jesus often says Amen, amen, I say to you... but that's a different context.

If I were a crewman, I would NOT want to be the cause of Jean Luc Having to say Make it so more than once. No way.

Happy New Year!

Rita said...

Tom and Robert, Happy New Year to you both!

Tom: Are we not destined to work as a result of the Fall? I'm not actually sure I'd cope with a life of idle luxury, you must be made of sterner stuff than me if you could!

Sadly feudalism will always be a non-starter in the States, you're far too egalitarian and obsessed with democracy (not necessarily a bad thing). I do just dream of working in a way that was meaningful and not cripplingly regulated and inspected. Feudal loyalty and interdependence strikes me as quite sensible provided it is tyrant free.