Tuesday, 15 July 2008

To the wouldbe distributor of nasty latex products at WYD

Driving to work this morning, the nice lady news reader on Radio 3 announced that people now have the right to harass Catholics at Sydney's World Youth Day, because if they didn't it would be an infringement of their human rights. So the right to distribute contraception outside the venue as a protest towards the Church and its teachings has been established. The newsreader went on to say that WYD was the Pope's way of spreading the word about global warming. I was getting cross at this point, so used my time to compose an imaginary reply to a fictitious condom distributor at the event. This was hastily written at work before the network crashed and I had to find something important to do, here it is.

Say Dude,

Just what is it with these things? Nasty, smelly, slimey things. What are they for? You tell me they prevent the spread of disease. But they are not as effective as the way promoted by our Papa. You tell me they are about safe sex. Let me tell you that we're not interested in that. We are interested in love. Papa wants us to have a good healthy loving relationship with our life partner through the sacrament of marriage, that is one place where true love is found and the only home of the sexual act. You can't tell me anything about that. Can you tell me anything about chastity? Can you tell me about how we are all to live continent lives and not give in to base urges and desires? Do you understand about love for your fellow man that never reveals itself in the sexual act?

So, just how many men is it that can't use them? 20%, 30%...or higher? They are no panacea, they create a whole heap of problems. We Catholics have freed ourselves from their false logic. It is clever of you to make men feel ashamed because they can't sustain anything when strangulated by a piece of latex. Come off it, these things kill passion. Admit it, it's like having a bath with your socks on.

Respectfully, Dude, leave us alone or rid yourself to these things, join us and find out about true love.



Jackie Parkes said...

Great post!

WhiteStoneNameSeeker said...

Well, written! I took dd to the dentist on Tues and while I was sitting waiting for her to finish being tortured I picked up Woman and Home which I assumed would be a fairly inoccuous mag. However for a holiday is was prescribed that one MUST pack British condoms.
Foreign condoms are rubbish apparently. Ah yes, safe sex.
Then there was all the warnings about how to store condoms so they don't get wrecked-safe sex?
Don't let them get too hot, don't let them get greasy, dont...dont and the list went on.
Oh yes use a condom-it's just so safe isn't it!!?!

God bless Papa Beni and his message of Christ's true love.

Mark Tan said...

the best way to prevent the spread of STD is to abstain from sex. foolproof, unlike condoms. these people want to do anything they want, but they want it free from any consequences. What nonsense!!!

Rita said...

Hello Mark
Thanks for visiting my blog.

The whole "safe-sex" message is just so wrong. Unfortunately, it has infested the nation's mindset, I think I'd be in trouble if I said anything like what I've said in this blog at the school where I work.

What is the situation like in Malaysia? Is the "safe-sex" ideology dominant in the schools?